Lime Green Gear Stuff

The cutie pie that I’m dating can rest assured that I truly care about him. The reason that he can feel totally confident in my genuine feeling is that I spent the entire morning with him in the Atlanta area one Saturday despite his outfit.

You may wonder, “what in the world could the man have worn to make Jali say all this on the internet.” Well I’ll share: He wore a lime green “Nappy” track suit… with emerald green and black racing stripes… with the name “Nappy” in bold white letters on the back. (I made a serious effort to research the “Nappy” apparel company, but was unable to find an active link.

I really wanted to share the look with you guys so that you’d really understand how much I care for this man. Remember, it was lime green. With emerald green and black racing stripes. Nappy.) Based on the one example of the design of the “Nappy” people that I’ve seen, I assume that the company is out of business. They really need to be.

The plan in the morning was to run out briefly to make it to an early morning doctor’s appointment. “A” didn’t really care what the doctor thought about his outfit. “A” should have cared.

When he got in the car, I sort of shielded my eyes from the glare of the lime green. He gave me that look and I didn’t say a word. Not one word until we were on the road.

Now let me explain, “A” is a beautiful man. Just beautiful… but remember the saying, ‘beauty is as beauty does’? Well “A” decided to do the Nappy lime green track suit that morning.

I offered to play a road game to make things fun. “Let’s name all the green things we see while we’re traveling.” My suggestion wasn’t even given a response.

“Oooh… there’s your car!” Yup, a guy was driving a shiny lime green convertable so I sped up a bit to get a good look. “A” refused to acknowledge the car at all.

“Green trees, green grass, green trash can…” I was on a roll playing my game. “A” wasn’t amused, but I find my entertainment where I can.

We pulled into the parking garage of the medical complex, and I decided to wait outside and read for a while. “Don’t worry baby, I’ll see you as soon as you come out of the building.” “A” didn’t get the joke.

After the appointment the original plan was to fly back home, change into more groovy gear and find some fun or trouble to get into. My stomach wasn’t having it.

I went into whiney mode. “I’m hungry, I’m hot… I have a headache.” I accompanied this much repeated refrain with my patented ‘pitiful Jali’ look. After about my 12th or 13th sigh and his obvious annoyance at my whining, “A” finally relented and agreed to feed me.

Did we stop at the closest fast food spot where we could whizz through the drive-thru?
Ha-Ha.

I sped onto the highway with a goal in mind: The Famouse Pancake House in Stone Mountain.
The restaurant was crowded (as always). TFPH is my favorite breakfast spot in the Metro area and I was excited to share the experience with the dude of my dreams.

The dude of my dreams still wore the lime green Nappy suit with emerald and black racing stripes. He remembered his outfit as we walked past the people sitting outside the restaurant. (see, this is why I need a camera phone – the look on his face when the realization set in was amazing).

I grabbed his hand to show solidarity, but turned away so that he wouldn’t see me giggling.
The hostess sat us near the middle of the room. “A” was cool – well I suppose as cool as one can be while wearing a lime green Nappy track suit with emerald and black racing stripes and with every eye in the restaurant watching his every move.

We ordered, the food was delicious, the conversation great and the time had come to make our grand exit.

“When I get home, I’m going to put this suit in a bag and pee on it”. (Yeah, yeah, but you still have it on now.)

I proudly held his hand again as we weaved through the crowded room of staring people. “He’s MY man!” (yeah, that was a paraphrased quote by “Squeek” from The Color Purple).

As we drove home I notice the engine temp gauge was slowly edging towards dangerous. “A” wisely suggested that we stop at the auto parts store for fluids. (Ooh goodie, another adventure.)

I make the most of each and every shopping opportunity and was cruising the aisles for things I might need, and I suppose that “A” got tired of waiting in the hot car. I looked up and he was standing next to me, sweating like crazy in his lime green track suit with emerald and black racing stripes.

I put down the thing-a-ma-bob that I had been examining and followed “A” to the register. The guy that helped us happened to mention that it was his B-day and that he couldn’t wait until he got off.

“Um sir.. may I ask you a serious question?”
“Sure”, he was a polite young man.
“If someone gave you a lime green Nappy track suit with emerald and black racing stripes as a gift for your birthday, would you wear it?”

Post script – “A” is finally speaking to me again. Would I do it all over knowing what I know now? Hells yeah! That was the best laugh I’d had for days and the other customers and clerks enjoyed it too.
If anyone can find a photo of a “Nappy” track suit, please send me a link!!

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18 Comments

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18 responses to “Lime Green Gear Stuff

  1. dirk.mancuso

    Oy. My head hurts just thinking about that lime green Nappy track suit with emerald and black racing stripes.

    We would get along great (and have everyone hating us) because I am relentless with stuff like that too!

  2. SunKingpoet

    You know what? I’m not speaking to you on his behalf now.

    LOL

  3. jali

    Dirk,

    Come to Atlanta and we’ll have a ball. There is a wealth of material here!

    SKP,

    I guess we know who else bought the lime green track suit with the emerald and black raing stripes.

  4. Rev. Smokin Steve

    I just googled it and searched on eBay. Nothing.

    Now, if the track suit was lime green, and had My Big Fat F**kin Head on the back, would it be different?

  5. jali

    Steven.

    What a question – we all KNOW that the Big Fat F**kin Head fashion statement would automatically override the lime green negativity.

  6. heartinsanfrancisco

    Loved the story! If your own wardrobe is as fine as your writing style, you’ll have no ugly encounters with fashion karma to worry about.

    NAPPY… uhhhh uhhhhh. They should really issue sunglasses with stuff like that.

  7. proudmary

    oh my god, that was hilarious!!
    Yes, you surely do love that man.
    🙂

  8. ~d (tilde)

    GURL
    the word nappy jumped out at me-this is too effing FUNNNY!

    HAHAHA!
    I am rollin and trying to find the same pix as Smokin…

  9. heartinsanfrancisco

    I enjoyed this story so much I read it to my husband. He said amid guffaws, “Count your blessings,” then wanted to know if he’d ever worn anything that embarrassed me. Well, no, although some of those OTHER guys in my past certainly did. Obviously I wasn’t feeling the love enough.

    I had to google Nappy, too. Had to. The only items marketed under this brand are for very small people who wear diapers.

  10. ~d (tilde)

    HAHAH, I HAD to come read this again-so I thought I would holla that I had been here!

  11. jali

    HeartsinSF,

    I have to take special care in dressing these days, since “A” is on constant watch. It’s hilarious at my place sometimes.

    Proud Mary,

    I’m glad you came to visit.

    ~D,

    Two times!! – gurl, thanks!

  12. Gail

    Oh my gosh! I had not been over here in a while…this is too freaking funny!

    I really should stop by more often!

  13. lynnie

    I think that you may have found someone who is the son that Daddy never had!!

    He could have been riding with you two wearing his “Italian Icee Blue” sports jacket with the “Dominican Commercial H.S. Father’s Club” emblem on the pocket. And since it was a 70’s double knit, he would have had so much sweat dripping off his head, you could have saved “A” the trouble of having to pee in a bag on his lime green track suit with emerald and black racing stripes.

  14. jali

    Gail,

    Thanks for coming back. To me the funniest part was asking “A” to read the blog entry – he couldn’t believe I wrote about it.

    Lynnie,

    I can just see Daddy in his Father’s Club jacket. I’m glad I was away at schoold during that attractive period in his life. “no Daddy, don’t get out of the car!”

  15. d~

    But what did the polite birthday boy at the cash register say?? Would he or wouldn’t he?

  16. jali

    d~
    He took a long (almost comicly choreographed) look at “A” and just started laughing.

  17. d~

    Haaaaaaaaaa! That couldn’t have gone over well!

  18. jali

    Funny as hell, though!

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