1. Imagine yourself in line at the grocery store on a Saturday afternoon at about 4p.m.
It’s crowded, your last nerve was plucked by that woman who refused to tell her children to stop harassing other shoppers. You finally make it to the express lane with your six little items and you breathe a sigh of relief. Home, a nice dinner and a cool drink await you.
You can see the target way ahead of you. The cashier is working quickly and efficiently. The people at the front of the line are smiling and happy – they’re steadily moving toward their goal: the register.
You don’t move one inch. Imagine your feelings. How can this be?
The person ahead of you has decided to leave a FIVE FOOT GAP between their shopping cart and the person ahead of them. Sneaky shoppers are jumping ahead of the person ahead of you and going straight to the checkout. The person ahead of you makes NO EFFORT TO CLOSE THE GAP so all the people behind her suffer.
I’ve never seen this in a grocery store. I used the situation to get to my point – I wanted you guys to feel my pain.
Every single day in the beautiful city of Atlanta, Georgia (Joe-gia) this situation occurs, but it occurs where it causes me much more irritation than it would in a supermarket.
It happens in the far left lane of I75/85 known as “The Connector”, the portion of the interstate system that passes through Midtown Atlanta.
Certain drivers fight their way to get into the fast lane. They swoop ahead of the pack back in the ‘burbs to guarantee their place at the head of the line when congestion sets in.
Once the roads are crowded, the same driver, Mr. Emperor of The World decides that a more leisurely ride is desired and leaves a gap large enough for tractor trailer or two to pull into. He has to work hard to maintain the gap, suddenly breaking to stop the flow of traffic if it seems that the left lane might be keeping up with the lanes to his right. He will only increase his speed if a car from his own lane dares to try to pass him on the right.
“Hell naw!” He says to himself. “There will be none of that today. Get back in line.” Allowing a car from behind him to gain the upper hand and actually keep up with the flow of traffic is not part of his agenda. His Emperor of the World status might be jeopardized if he allowed even one car from the left lane to continue on it’s way and make it to work at a reasonable time. Arrrrrgh!
2. I love to share a nice meal in good company. Most of my buddies are pretty cool people and we split the bill with no argument, drop a great tip and go home happy.
There’s a newer member to our crowd who is a cheap ass. He once actually gave the bartender a $5 bill and a quarter for a $5.25 beer. We were shocked. The bartender was shocked. The other patrons in the vicinity were shocked. (we were a bunch of shocked people, huh?) This led to whispered conversations around the bar and we remembered other instances where he showed his true colors.
We would split a dinner check and he would drop exactly $14.95 or whatever the cost of his entree might have been onto the pile of cash. He would need to run to the bathroom or go out to smoke right at that moment and the rest of us would total the payment and add the appropriate tip. We figured he was just in too much of a rush at the time and that it was just an oversight. No oversight – cheap ass.