I’ve been hitting links all morning and came across a page I like. (link http://www.heartless-bitches.com/rants/niceguys/comments35.shtml) The page had a whole section dedicated to “Nice Guys” and I was inspired to write a bit about nice guys here.
I’ve dated guys that I had to leave because of boredom. For some reason, my friends and I classified these dudes as “nice guys” and we decided that “that” type of dude wouldn’t cut it – not for the fly chicks of Hollis, Queens in 1975.
The basic premise carried over into my adult life and I never questioned the authenticity of the title I hung on these dudes. I just avoided them (nice guys)as I did the dentally impaired (no teefus), the commonsenseless (stupido), the too cheap to tip idiots, the still living with their moms goofballs and the too much cologne – too little soap gents (stinkies).
I have coworkers, neighbors and associates who I deem “nice guys” based on one commonality: boooooooring. They’ll tell me stories of women who dump them for “bad boys” and wonder why “nice guys always finish last.” i use to sympathize – now I know better.
I realize that the self proclaimed nice guys aren’t necessarily nice -a guy can be as boring as hell because he’s a self centered bitch. Some of the boring guys can only discuss Star Wars or Spiderman with any animation – ask about the federal deficit or the immigration debate and the conversation falls flat.
I dated a guy a few years ago that I decided would be good for me because he was so nice. (meaning not very hot, but not embarassingly uncool) He seemed generous and kind – he invited me to Atlantic City for our first date for dinner.
We took a long walk down the boardwalk and I learned that he was an excellent listener (know better now translation: he had ZERO to add to the conversation.) The first kiss was miserably unsexy but I looked at his lack of skill as charming – I would teach him. (never again)
As we began dating more frequently, (I was determined that I needed a “nice guy” so I told myself to stick it out) I learned some disturbing things – he didn’t tip well( he wasn’t generous unless there would be a direct benefit to himself), and he could be unbelieveably set in his ways. He was corny – he wanted to walk around the mall holding my hand and I went through with it reluctantly the first couple of times. The third weekend in a row that he wanted to take me to the mall (to fucking walk around holding hands) was the eyeopener. I couldn’t hack it with this boring, selfish, color by number stay within the lines guy anymore.
Nice guys that finish last aren’t really nice guys at all (I said “atall” like Forrest Gump). They’re whiney boring guys.